If your brain never seems to turn off, you’re not alone. You replay conversations, analyze every decision, and imagine every possible outcome before something even happens. You tell yourself you’re “just being prepared,” but really — you’re overthinking.
As a therapist, I see this all the time, especially in high-achieving women and moms who are used to handling everything. Overthinking can look like productivity on the outside… but on the inside, it feels like mental exhaustion that never quits.
Let’s talk about what’s actually happening — and the tools therapists use to help people get out of that mental spin.
What Overthinking Really Is (and Why You Can’t Just “Stop”)
Overthinking happens when your mind gets stuck in analysis mode. You replay things from the past, worry about the future, or mentally rehearse every possible version of what could go wrong. It feels like problem-solving — but it’s actually your nervous system stuck in overdrive.
The goal isn’t to “stop thinking.” It’s to shift how you relate to your thoughts — so you can get unstuck, take action, and feel more grounded in the present moment.
Why High-Achievers Are Especially Prone to Overthinking
If you’re someone who’s always gone above and beyond, you’ve probably learned that thinking things through keeps you safe. You’ve relied on planning, analyzing, and anticipating — and those skills have probably helped you succeed.
But here’s the catch: the same brain that’s great at problem-solving can turn on itself. Overthinking often comes from perfectionism, anxiety, or the pressure to “get it right.” You start to believe that if you just think hard enough, you’ll finally feel calm or certain. But the truth is — you can’t think your way out of anxiety.
That’s where therapy tools come in.
6 Tools Therapists Use to Help You Stop Overthinking
These are real techniques therapists use in sessions — backed by research and easy to apply to daily life.
1. Name What’s Happening
The first step is simply noticing: “Oh, I’m overthinking right now.”
Labeling it takes you out of the spiral and helps you see the thought as something you can choose to step back from, not something that controls you.
2. Give Your Thoughts a “Container”
If your mind is constantly spinning, set aside a specific time each day for “worry time.” When a worry pops up, remind yourself, “I’ll think about that later.”
This trick tells your brain there’s a boundary — you don’t have to think about everything all the time.
3. Shift From “Why” to “What Now”
When you notice yourself stuck in “why did this happen” or “what if” thoughts, try moving to “what now.”
Ask: “What’s one small thing I can do right now that would actually help?”
It gets you out of rumination and back into action.
4. Challenge the Thought
A core CBT skill is learning to challenge your thoughts instead of believing them.
When you catch yourself spiraling, ask:
- What’s the evidence this is true?
- What’s the worst that could actually happen — and could I handle it?
- Is there another, more balanced way to see this?
You don’t have to be blindly positive — just balanced.
5. Ground Yourself in the Present
Overthinking keeps you in your head. Grounding brings you back into your body.
Try this: notice five things you can see, four you can touch, three you can hear, two you can smell, and one you can taste.
It’s a quick nervous-system reset that brings you back to now.
6. Use Thought-Stopping or Redirection
When you catch a repetitive thought starting, imagine a stop sign, or say “Stop” (yes, out loud). Then replace it with a grounding phrase like, “I’m safe right now,” or “I don’t need to solve that yet.”
This trains your brain to interrupt old mental habits.
A Simple Routine to Calm an Overthinking Mind
Here’s how you can start putting these tools together:
- Catch it: “I’m overthinking right now.”
- Contain it: “I’ll come back to this during my worry time.”
- Ground: Take 3 deep breaths or do the 5-senses exercise.
- Act: Ask, “What’s one small step I can take right now?”
- Redirect: If the thought comes back, say “Stop,” and return to your grounding phrase.
It’s not about eliminating overthinking overnight — it’s about teaching your brain a new rhythm. Over time, those spirals lose their grip.
How Therapy Can Help You Stop Overthinking
Therapy gives you a place to practice these tools with support. You’ll learn how to recognize your unique overthinking patterns, calm your nervous system, and build trust in your own decisions again.
If this sounds familiar, you don’t have to keep living in your head. As a licensed therapist in Denver and Los Angeles, I help high-achieving women and moms learn to quiet the noise, ease anxiety, and reconnect with what matters most.
If you’re ready to feel more present and less in your head, I’d love to help. Schedule your complimentary 20-minute consultation here.
FAQ
Q: Is overthinking the same as anxiety?
A: Not exactly. Overthinking can be a symptom of anxiety, but it’s also a learned mental habit. The difference is that anxiety shows up in your body, while overthinking happens in your thoughts. Therapy helps you address both.
Q: Can therapy really help me stop overthinking?
A: Yes. Therapists use proven approaches like CBT, mindfulness, and nervous system regulation to help you recognize and interrupt overthinking patterns so you can feel calmer and more focused.
Q: What kind of therapist helps with overthinking?
A: Look for a therapist who specializes in anxiety, perfectionism, or high-functioning anxiety. If you’re in Denver or Los Angeles, I work with high-achieving women and moms who are ready to quiet their minds and find balance.
Written by Hilary Goulding, LMFT, a licensed psychotherapist specializing in anxiety, perfectionism, and high-achieving women in Denver, CO and Los Angeles, CA.
